Tea Time?

Tea Time?

By Quentin Smeltzer, 9/16/2010

Democrats are rubbing their hands in glee now that eight Tea Party candidates have beaten more moderate Republicans in Republican primaries.  But why? 

Democrats say people like Sharon Angle, Rand Paul and Christine O’Donnell can’t win general elections.  Heck, even Karl Rove says O’Donnell can’t win!  Well, maybe not in Cuba, turd blossom, but I think she’ll do just fine right here in the good ol’ US of A.  In fact, she might do alright in Cuba now that Fidel has admitted that a true welfare state, without a cold war superpower pumping cash into it, really can’t make it on its own.  Tea Party activism should be popping up in Havana any day now…

Republican hypocrisy is surely the eighth wonder of the world, not that anyone can name the original seven without turning to Wikipedia.  By the way, six of the seven wonders have disappeared along with all Republican credibility. 

A few months ago Republicans were wailing about deficits.  In fact, that’s what got the tea baggers out of their trailer homes and into the streets.  That and the fact there’s a Kenyan Islam-o-terrorist in the White House!  How did that happen?  But now Republicans insist that hundred thousand dollar tax cuts be extended to millionaires at a cost of billions of dollars of borrowed money per year, extracted from the futures of the rest of us.  Sounds like a plan!

Of course, these are the same Republicans who won in 2000 with a pledge to restore fiscal discipline.  Then they ran up the largest spending binge seen on this planet since the Hanging Gardens of Babylon (second wonder of the world) or the last time Donald Trump decorated a vacation home (wonder why).  To say Republican necks must be suffering the effects of whiplash doesn’t do it justice.  My belief is their heads actually spin like Linda Blair’s in the Exorcist. 

When predicting whether tea baggers can be elected, you have to remember that this is the country that elected George Bush—twice!  And the second time he got the most votes!  Powerful forces are in play.  Cutting taxes is a drug.  It is more powerful than roads, bridges, health care and foreign wars.  It is a drug the way welfare was a drug.  It is an obsessive compulsion that leads to debilitating results. 

Will a society endure that is based on the socialist principle that you give to all according to their need?  No it will not.  Few will work if it not working pays.  We figured that out a few decades ago. 

But will a society endure that is based on a Darwinian meritocracy, where it is every man for himself according to his ability and his effort?  No it will not.  The talented few will end up with all the marbles and the middle will suffer.  Without a strong middle class to buy stuff, the economy will collapse.  This isn’t theory.  This is the end of eight years of Bush.  This is what is known as 2008.

We’ve seen both of these movies, so why worry?  Because Americans love a remake, that’s why!  Somehow we forget that Rocky will win and John Connor will survive.  Somehow we’re surprised when the head of the little girl possessed by demons turns completely around on its axis.  Just like Republican “principles.” 

Cue the voice over:  In a world where no one pays taxes and you can pay for your cardiogram with a chicken, if you have a chicken… Don’t miss, Robber Barons II, Mansions and Misery!  Coming this November to a congress near you!